It's the 3rd week of January, and I feel absolutely terrified. Two of my clients in my social media marketing agency don't have funds to pay me for February, which they politely made me aware of the day they were supposed to make payment. My YouTube channel just got demonetized - I can't even begin to say how heartbreaking that was, especially since I'd been watching my estimated royalties triple as I invested more time into creating content this year. And then the kicker - Facebook / Instagram announced the biggest algorithm change that literally evaporated every competitive advantage I had in social media - including what I brought to my clients.
So there you have it.
As entrepreneurs, we rely on the information presented to us to make the best decisions.
I can't just go by what my gut says anymore, because now if I make the wrong decision, I don't have money to eat. Simple as that. When you're a full-time entrepreneur, every decision affects whether or not you're able to eat.
And that's where the terror sets in. How are we supposed to feel confident enough to make the right decisions? How are we supposed to know we won't make a mistake?
As a daughter of Christ, I know I am favored by the Most High God. I know I am destined for rich rewards. But how do I keep the terror from getting in the way of my destiny?
One of the things I miss most about my full-time job is that I never heard an excuse from my boss as to why I wouldn't get my paycheck that week. There was never "our clients didn't pay us, so we can't pay you." There was never "I didn't realize how little I had left in the budget this month." There was never "I can't make payment yet, but can you still do the work and then I'll just pay you back next month?"
No, when you work a 9 to 5 job, everything is given to you on a silver platter. It's funny, I never really felt that way when I had a full-time job. When I worked in corporate America for at least 36 hours per week, I remember feeling trapped. I was perfectly happy with my job. I did work that I really did love. I worked with people who I truly did respect.
But I felt trapped. There was no promotion, project or reward big enough to make me forget that my greatest desire in life was to be a full-time entrepreneur.
It was CONSTANTLY on my mind, thinking about when I could finally be living my God-given purpose as a business owner full time.
I remember even when I won 3 Telley awards, the most any producer in our department earned, I still felt a burning desire to hand in my walking papers and take the leap into my life as a full-time entrepreneur.
What stopped me?
Well, the unknown, for one. At that point, I earned money in my business, but I wasn't earning a profit. I was spending WAAAY too much in Marketing to earn just a few dollars of profit, and I knew without cushion, I'd be swimming in the red way too soon.
The second thing that stopped me was fear. I was afraid of making a mistake, afraid of making a wrong decision. After all, my job was SECURE. My job was RELIABLE. My job liked me and rewarded me all the time.
So why leave?
It's funny when I think back to that mindset, "why leave?" Because I think that is what foreshadowed the way God pushed me into making the leap into entrepreneurship. More on that in another blog. Want to read the full story now? Grab my book "The War Of Purpose" here.
But now that I'm here, now that I've been a full-time entrepreneur for 18 months, now that I have Godlywood Girl and my social media marketing agency up and running on autopilot - I still feel terrified.
Watch my vlog about business on YouTube
The unknown is still there.
And I'm just now coming to terms with the fact it will always be there. As much as I can plan for a great quarter and a great new product release and a great new client acquisition, at the end of the day, I can't predict what will happen tomorrow.
All I can do is be grateful for the resources God gave me TODAY, and use them to my fullest ability.
So even though things went wrong, I'm still going to hand out flyers for new social media clients. I'm still going to host free webinars and live streams to raise awareness about my books and services. I'm still going to film YouTube videos and edit commercials that help women achieve their greatest purpose for Christ. Because even though I can't get rid of the fear, I can certainly step out on faith with the tools God has put right in front of me to work with.
Let's get to work.
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